The Letter
by Calliope Jones
Summary: Remus finds a mysterious letter waiting for him. Was a short RemusTonks ficlet. Isn't anymore. OoTP spoilers
1. A start

        Remus found the folded parchment on his pillow when he returned at dawn.  He gazed at it thoughtfully as he stripped off his dusty robes.  He folded the robes and laid them at the foot of his bed and then picked up the parchment.  He didn't recognize the loopy handwriting, so he unfolded it, glancing at the bottom to find a signature.

        The name he found made him pause.

        _Nymphadora?_

        Why was Tonks writing him a letter?  She only practically lived in the same house.

        Bemused, he began to read.

**Remus,**

**I thought you should know something.  **

**I can't sleep when you're not here. **

**I worry about you.   I know you wouldn't like to hear that.  It's not that I think you can't take care of yourself, I know you can.  I see past that gentle unassuming exterior that everyone else sees.  I've seen the violence and anger you hide.  **

**You can take care of yourself, I know.  But I'm afraid you don't want to.  It seems to me that you've given up on life since Sirius died.  You don't eat, you hardly sleep... I've been watching you.**

        She'd been watching _him_?  _Tonks_?  He hadn't realized that.  He sighed and looked back at the letter, reading more.

**I bet you didn't know that, did you?**

        He chuckled at that.

  ****

**The nights that I stay here, I can hear when you leave, and can't fall asleep until I hear you come back.  And sometimes, I can't sleep even then, because I can hear you moving around downstairs and I want to go to you and talk to you, but I can't because I'll just get nervous and trip on something or break something, or say something stupid.**

        He sighed.  _Oh, Tonks.  If only she had known the number of nights he had wanted someone to come and talk to him.  someone who wouldn't pity him or treat him like an invalid, but just someone to talk to.  To distract him from his own thoughts._

**And I couldn't go to you because I was certain that you would be able to see what I was feeling.  You would look at me and know how much I wanted to be with you.**

        Remus stopped and reread the last line.  _What?  _

**There.  I said it.  So its up to you now, I suppose.  It is taking the coward's way, writing this in a letter, but I just didn't have the nerve to tell you to your face.  And this way, if you aren't interested, or just don't think of me that way, you can just pretend that this never happened.  I promise I'll respect your decision.  I wouldn't want to force you into anything.**

**I just thought you should know.**

**Nymphadora**

        She wanted to be with him?  He was stunned.  And flattered.  What would a young girl like Tonks want with an old wolf like him?

        He had nothing to offer.  He had no job, no money.  He was despised by most of the wizarding community.  He was given to fits of melancholy and once a month he turned into a real beast.

        She was young and innocent.  She had her whole life in front of her.  It would be a big mistake for her to throw her lot in with his.

        He was intrigued.

        Nymphadora.  He pictured her dimpled smile and ever-changing eyes.  The crazy hair and compact athletic body.  

        He was tempted.  

        Before he could change his mind, he left his room and went to hers, knocking briskly on the door.

        He heard a muffled crash and an oath, then the door opened.  Tonks stood in the doorway, clad in rumpled jeans and a lime green t-shirt that matched the random stripes in her bobbed hair.

        "Remus?"  She squeaked, then dropped her wand.

        She flushed a bright pink and quickly bent to retrieve it.

        "Nervous about something, Tonks?"  Remus teased gently.

        Her blush deepened.  "What do you mean?"

        He held up the letter.  "This, perhaps?"  _Why hadn't he ever noticed how pretty she was?    _

        She blinked.  "Oh.  Right.  That."

        She looked down at her bare feet, gnawing on her bottom lip.  "So you read it, then?"

        "I did."  He replied, his voice solemn.

        She peeked up at him.  "And?"

        He tucked the letter into his trouser pocket.  "I wanted to clear something up."

        She dropped her wand again.  "You do?"

        This time, he picked up her wand.  "Nymphadora..."  He held the wand out to her.

        She tried to take it from him, but he wouldn't release it.  She lifted her eyes to his.  "Remus?"

        He took a deep breath.  "Did you mean it?"

        "What?"  She tugged on her wand, but he held fast.  

        "What you wrote."  He said patiently.  "Did you mean it?"

        She looked away again.  "Well, yeah.  I did."

        He released her wand.  "Good."

        Her confused eyes flew up to meet his.  

        He smiled at her.  It felt like the first real smile he'd had in weeks.  "Want some cocoa?"  

        It wasn't a declaration or proposition of any kind,  but it was a start.

        __


	2. Chocolate

Disclaimer:  I don't own Tonks Or Remus.  Sigh.

A/N:   Jeez you reviewers are a pushy bunch.  It _was_ supposed to be a one shot.  But because I'm so nice (and bored) here you go. 

            Tonks wasn't, by nature, a patient woman.  She preferred instant gratification to waiting any day.  She hadn't had any time alone with Remus since the night he invited her down for cocoa.  The entire Weasley clan, minus Percy, but with Harry and Hermione, had descended on 12 Grimmauld place the next day.  The house was filled with people, and there never seemed to be a time when she could find him alone.  It had been nearly a week, and she was starting to wonder if perhaps she had dreamed the whole thing.  

            Except, she would catch him looking at her with a thoughtful frown on his face.  She was desperate to know what he was thinking, and had decided that tonight, she would find out.  So she lay on her bed, waiting.  Listening to the sounds of the others retiring for the night.  

            Finally, the house was still, and mostly silent.  Remus had not come upstairs, so she knew she could find him alone downstairs.  She slipped out of bed, throwing a voluminous cardigan over her nightshirt, and headed off in search of him.   She tiptoed down the stairs, carefully making her way around the troll-foot umbrella stand that always seemed to get in her way.  As she pushed through the door to the kitchen, she congratulated herself for getting this far without tripping on anything.

            Then she tripped.

            Gentle hands caught her around the waist, steadying her.  She looked up to find Remus' amused face near hers.

            "Wotcher, Remus.  Nice reflexes."

            He grinned at her.  "I was waiting for that to happen."

            At her questioning look, he explained.  "You were far too quiet coming down here."

            He hadn't released his light hold on her, and she savored his touch.  "So, how did you know it was me?"

            He leaned closer and sniffed.  "Smelled you."

            It sent a thrill through her.  "So what do I smell like?"  She asked softly, curious.

            He sniffed her again.  "Chocolate."  He replied.

            She was a little disappointed.  She had hoped for something a little more… exotic.  "Chocolate?  I smell like chocolate?" 

            "Sort of."  He released her, stepping back.  "It's a bit complicated.  But, basically, your scent is very similar to chocolate."

            "Oh.  Well…"  Bereft of his touch, she went to the table and sat down.  "I guess that's good."

            With a wave of his wand, Remus sent two mugs of cocoa from the stove to the table, then sat across from her.  He could see the disappointment in her eyes.  How could he explain to her that her scent gave him the same thrill that very good chocolate did?

            "It is good."  He told her.  "I like chocolate."  It sounded lame even to him.

            She tilted her head.  "Yeah?"

            He nodded.  "I _really_ like chocolate."  He put a lot of feeling into the words, hoping that she would understand.

            "So what about me?"  She asked.

            He sipped his cocoa.  She apparently hadn't caught his veiled compliment.  "What about you?"

            She took a deep breath and plunged ahead.  "Do you like me as much as you like chocolate?"

            He gazed at her for a while, his golden eyes somber.  He wasn't very good at this man/woman thing.  He didn't want to accidentally insult her.  "I think," He said cautiously, "I like you in an entirely different way, Nymphadora."

            Oh, now we were getting somewhere.  And she was really starting to love the way he said her name.  He made it almost tolerable.

            She propped her chin on her hand and studied him.  He looked healthier than he had a few days ago.  Not as weary, and his face had filled out a little.  She knew it had to be Molly's doing.  She had taken one look at Remus when she arrived and had clucked over him like a mother hen.

            "Molly's cooking seems to agree with you."  She told him, lifting her mug to take a drink.

            He nodded.  "I suppose it is.  My own cooking isn't very good."

            Tonks could understand that.  "Mine too.  Sometimes I wish I could be more like her."

            He looked surprised.  "How do you mean?"

            She shrugged.  "You know.  Competent."

            He frowned at her, a line appearing between his brows.  "Why do you put yourself down like that?"

            She looked away, jiggling her mug to make the liquid inside swirl around.  "Because I'm so clumsy.  I'm always falling over things and dropping stuff."

            "Well, that's true, but you're a very good auror.  Molly wouldn't be able to do that."

            "Maybe."

            He paused.  "Then again… she can be kind of scary when she gets her temper going."

            A giggle slipped out and she peeked at him.

            His eyes were full of warmth.  "But I don't think pink hair would suit her quite as well as it does you."

            "You really think so?"  She asked.

            He nodded.  "Oh, absolutely.  She would look rather silly."

            She laughed again.  "No, Remus.  I meant do you really think it suits me?"

            "Yes, Tonks.  I think it suits you brilliantly."  

            She beamed at him.  She had worried that maybe her odd appearance would bother him.

            Her smile was a powerful thing, Remus decided.  And knowing that he had been able to make her smile was even better.  It bothered him when she put herself down for being clumsy.  There were worse things.  And clumsiness was one of the things that made her, well, her.

            And catching her when she tripped was a very good excuse to touch her.  

            He drank some more cocoa, content just to be alone with her.  They sat together in companionable silence for a while, occasionally glancing at each other.

            Finally, Tonks drained the last drops from her mug and rose.  "I should go to bed." 

            He stood up as well, sending the mugs to the sink with a flick of his wand.  "I heard you're taking the girls shopping tomorrow."

            She nodded, yawning, and stretching her arms over her head.  He couldn't help but notice the way her breasts strained against the soft cotton of her nightshirt.   "Yeah.  Should be fun."

            He came around the table and escorted her out of the kitchen, his hand at the small of her back.  "You'll have a good time, I'm sure."

            When they neared the umbrella stand, he gave it wide berth.  "We should just get rid of that thing."  He said when he saw her glance at it.

            She shook her head.  "No point.  I'd just find something else to crash into.  Better the enemy I know."

            He followed her up the stairs, whispering.  "I don't mind you being clumsy, you know."

            She stopped at the top of the stairs, looking down at him.  "You don't?"

            He halted on the step just below her, which brought them eye to eye.  "Not at all."

            Her eyes locked on his.  "Why's that?"

            "I quite like catching you." 

            Her breath came out in a sigh.  "Oh."  Her cheeks flushed pink.

            He reached out, sliding his hands around her waist.  "May I kiss you, Nymphadora?"

            Her lips parted, and she nodded slowly.  He leaned close, brushing his lips against hers.  For a kiss, it was sweet, gentle and a little uncertain.  And all too brief.  

            Her eyes flew open in disappointment when he pulled back.  But the look in his gleaming eyes stilled any protests.  

            Hands locking against her spine, he leaned in and reclaimed her lips, his tongue sweeping inside to sample her taste.  Her hands crept up of his shoulders to tangle in his thick hair.  He hummed low in his throat, continuing his leisurely exploration of her mouth.  When they parted this time, he was smiling.

            "I think…"  He said quietly, then kissed her again.  "Yes. Definitely."

            "Definitely what?"  She murmured.

            "Definitely better than chocolate." 

A/N:  This is going somewhere.  Where, I have no idea.  Any ideas?  Help!    


	3. Gossip

Disclaimer:  JK Rowling owns Remus, Tonks and all recognizable characters and places.  Sigh.  I want to be her.

A/N:   Hey reviewers!!  You guys are so sweet!

Harryluvzginny—sorry love.  I have absolutely no control over these characters.  I start going one way, they immediately drag it into the gutter.      

After a morning of whirlwind shopping, Tonks, Hermione and Ginny collapsed at a table at Florean Fortescue's to take a break.  After ordering fortification in the form of decadent ice cream sundaes, they settled in to chat.  Tonks had anticipated questions about what the Order was up to these days, or maybe gossip about Hogwart's.  She never anticipated the question Hermione posed.

            "So what is going on between you and Professor Lupin?"  The bushy haired teen asked.

            Tonks' mouth dropped open.  "What?"

            "You and Lupin."  Ginny said with a grin.  "Spill it."

            "I don't know what you mean."  Tonks lied.

            Hermione laughed.  "Oh, come on Tonks.  We saw how he was looking at you this morning."

            "What?"  Tonks looked back and forth between the two younger girls.  "How was he looking at me?"

            "Like he wanted to have _you for breakfast."  Hermione replied with a wicked grin.  _

            "Really?"  Tonks looked to Ginny who nodded, giggling.  "_Really?"_  She hadn't noticed that.  She had been to busy trying not to stare at him.

               She waited to speak until after their sundaes were served.  Picking up her spoon, she dug into the chocolate ice cream.  

            Ginny drummed her fingers on the table.  "Come on, Tonks.  'Fess up.  Is something going on?"

            "Even if there was, which I'm not saying there is, what makes you think I'd tell you?"

            Hermione eyed her shrewdly.  "If there was, I would imagine you'd be bursting to tell someone."

            Tonks blinked.  

"Ok.  Fine. You're right."  She blurted out.  "But you have to swear not to say anything to anyone."

            "We swear."  Both girls chimed.

            "So there is something going on?"  Ginny asked, leaning forward eagerly.

            "Something."  Tonks said.  Then she told her rapt teenage audience about the letter.  And how he'd invited her down for cocoa.

            "And then, we all showed up and got in the way."  Ginny grimaced.

            "Well, kinda.  But I worked around that."  Tonks admitted.  "I went looking for him after everyone went to bed last night."

            "Did you find him?"  Hermione asked, her forgotten sundae melting in front of her.

            Tonks nodded.  "Yeah.  I did."  She couldn't stop the dreamy smile that crossed her face.  

            "Ooh."  Hermione sighed.  "What happened?"

            Tonks took a deep breath.  "He kissed me."

            The two younger girls squealed.  Tonks grinned at their excitement.

            "And?"  Hermione prompted.

            "And what?"  Tonks asked.

            "How was it?"  Ginny supplied.

            Tonks shook her head.  "No.  No way am I going to discuss that with you."

            "Come on…"  Ginny pleaded.

            "I bet he's a really good kisser."  Hermione said softly.  "He's so intense.  Focused."

            Tonks gasped.  "Hermione!"

            She shrugged.  "What?"

            "You shouldn't say things like that about him.  He's your teacher."  Tonks scolded.

            Hermione shook her head.  "Not right now he's not.  Right now he's the guy my friend is snogging.  So anything goes."

            Ginny licked ice cream off her spoon.  "Tonks, all the girls think he's hot.  It was a big topic of discussion at school when he was there."

            Tonks gaped at them.  "Are you kidding?"  Then a strange thought occurred to her.  "Oh, Merlin, please tell me neither of you were harboring any schoolgirl crushes."

            The girls assured her they weren't, then dug for more information.   Tonks finally relented.  

            "It was fantastic.  That's all I'll say."  She dug into her sundae again, scooping up a spoonful of hot fudge.  "There is one other thing, though."  She said thoughtfully.

            The girls looked at her expectantly.

            "He said the sweetest thing…"  She told them softly.

            "What?"  Ginny asked eagerly.  

            Tonks smiled.  "He said I was better than chocolate."

            Ginny and Hermione gave heartfelt sighs.  

            "I wish someone would say that to me."  Ginny said wistfully.  

            Tonks saw an opportunity to do some digging of her own.  "Wouldn't that be 'better than Quidditch' instead?"  She said with a wink.

            Ginny blushed, her cheeks becoming almost as bright as her hair.

            "I thought so."  Tonks nodded with satisfaction, then turned to Hermione.  "And you…"

            "Oh, look."  Hermione exclaimed, cutting her off.  "Professor Lupin!"  She waved.

            Tonks looked over her shoulder, and sure enough, there was Remus, striding down the street towards them.  She took a moment to watch him approach; noticing the way the sun glinted off his hair, taking in his broad shoulders and his loose-limbed saunter.

            He was hot, all right.  All that animal grace mixed with brains and an edge of civilization.  Mm-hmm.  A very nice package indeed.

            She tore her gaze away from him to shoot a warning look at the girls.  "Not a word.  You promised."

            They nodded, looking up innocently as he drew near.

            "Good afternoon, Ladies."  He greeted with a smile.  "How was shopping?"

            "We had great fun."  Tonks told him, waving to the mass of parcels piled on an empty chair.

            He nodded.  "Good.  Molly sent me to fetch you.  She said it's time you came back."

            "Ok."  Tonks and the girls stood up and began gathering their belongings.

            Remus looked at Hermione and Ginny.  "You two go ahead."  He told them.  "We'll catch up."

            The two girls exchanged knowing looks and left, giggling.

            "They're going to think something's going on."  Tonks warned him.

            He grinned.  "Like they hadn't already dragged it out of you.  I know that's what you three were talking about when I showed up."

            She blushed.  "Oh."  She glanced up at him.  "Do you mind?"

            "What?  That they now know that an old werewolf like me was lucky enough to catch the eye of a pretty young thing like you?"

            Oh, Merlin, he said the sweetest things.  "You're not old, Remus."  She told him.

            He shrugged.

            She smiled impishly up at him.  "Did you know that the girls at Hogwart's think you're hot?"

            He actually blushed.  It was adorable.  "Umm, well…uh.  They do?"  He seemed to be at a loss.

            Tonks batted her eyes at him.  "Oh, Professor Lupin."  She sighed in a high-pitched voice.

            "Tonks…"  He said in a warning voice, but there was amusement in his eyes.

            "I think I need to stay after class for some extra credit."  She added, snickering.

            "That's quite enough out of you, young lady."  He said with mock severity.

            "Oh, but Professor…"

            "Miss Tonks, one more word and I'll have to give you detention."  He was getting into the spirit of things now.

            She moved a little closer.  "Promise?"  She breathed.

            His eyes darkened.  "You're a trouble maker."  He said softly.

            "And you love it."  She replied, eyes twinkling.

            His lips curved up.  "Maybe."  His gaze lowered to her mouth.  Then he lifted his hand, touching on finger to the corner of her lips.  "You have some chocolate, just there."

            She lifted her hand to wipe it away, but he stopped her.  "Allow me."  He whispered.

            Then he lowered his head, until their mouths were a breath apart.  He licked the smudge of chocolate off, and then turned the gentle touch into a kiss.

            Was he a good kisser?  Tonks thought back to Hermione's question.  He was amazing, she decided as she melted against him.  Abso-bloody-lutely amazing.  Who knew the mild mannered professor had moves like that?

            When they broke apart, he rested his forehead against hers.  "We should head back for dinner."  He whispered.

            "Right.  Dinner."  Who could think about food after that?  Her eyes met his, her hunger mirrored there.  "I'm famished."  

            He grinned wickedly.  "Do I detect some sarcasm?"

            "Well, honestly, Remus.  How can I think about food now?"  She replied.  Al she could think about was dragging him into some dark corner for some serious snogging.

            He must have read her thoughts, because he slid his arm around her waist and led her down the street.  "Now's neither the time nor place, Nymphadora.  We'll have to finish this later."

            A heated thrill went through her.  _Finish this?  Oh, boy.  Had she thought him mild mannered?  Try seductive.  Try very, very sexy.  Even when he was being very proper, he still managed to get her started._

            She was in big trouble.


	4. Voices

Disclaimer:  The usual.  I don't own them.  Wish I did.  Cause then I'd be rich.

Remus stood by the window, shoulders hunched, hands thrust deep in his pockets, staring gloomily out at the waxing moon.  With his burgeoning relationship with Tonks, the coming full moon had amazingly slipped his mind.  

            Snape's delivery of the Wolfsbane potion had brought it back into focus.  And had plunged him back into despondency.  

            He sighed, his breath fogging up the windowpane.  What had he been thinking, getting involved with her?

            _Thinking you might get laid,_ a devilish little voice, which sounded a lot like Sirius, whispered.

            "Shut up."  Remus told the voice.  There was more to things with Nymphadora than that.  

            _So, you don't want to jump her bones?_  The voice asked slyly. __

            Remus growled under his breath.  "That's not the point."  

            _Isn't it?_

"No.  I care for her more than that."

Then he shook his head.  Great.  Just bloody fantastic.  Now he was arguing with a voice in his head.

            He could feel the beast rising up within him, the higher the moon rose.  But years of keeping it at bay had him focusing on the sounds of the night around him; to bind it back into the tidy cage it was usually locked in.

            He forced his breathing to slow and focused on the sound of the breeze outside, the barking of a dog down the street, the creaks and groans of the house around him.  Then his keen hearing picked up another sound, a soft muffled cry.

            He stiffened, turning his head, listening carefully now.  

            Silence…

            And then, there it was again.  A whimper.  Coming from somewhere in the house.  

            His first thought was that Harry was dreaming again.  The boy had been plagued with nightmares since the events at the Ministry of Magic.  He went to his bedroom door and quietly opened it, stepping out into the gloomy hall.  

            Nothing.  

            He had hardly taken two steps toward the end of the hall where Harry and Ron slept when he heard it.

            _"Remus."_

            Someone whispered his name, and it wasn't Harry.  

It was Tonks.

Breath caught in his throat, he crept to her door, knocking gently.

"Tonks?"  He called softly.

He was answered by a silence so thick it seemed almost palpable.  The whole energy of the house seemed to shift around him, closing in on him, pressing down on him.  

Something was terribly wrong.

The air around him grew cold, damp.  He knocked again, more forcefully, then tried to open the door.  It wouldn't budge.  "Tonks!  Open the door!"

When she screamed, his heart stopped.  Whipping his wand from his belt, he blew the door open with a shower of red sparks and leapt inside.  

The vision that greeted him froze him in his tracks.  

A tall, elegant dark haired man was standing over a dark haired boy on his knees.  

_Sirius._  Remus realized when the boy lifted his bloodied rebellious face.  He was watching a teenaged Sirius.  The man, Sirius' father, drew back his hand and slapped his son across the face.  

Sirius' head was thrown to the side by the blow, but he recovered quickly, spitting at his father.  "Is that the best you can do?"  He sneered.

"You will not associate with those boys any more.  Do you hear me?"  The man seethed.  "Especially that werewolf."

Sirius stared up at him, resentment burning in his eyes.  "I'll associate with whomever I please.  You can't stop me.  And Remus is a better man than you are."

With a sound of rage, Sirius' father lashed out, kicking his son in the stomach, knocking him over.  As he continued kicking him, the vision faded, the sounds of the beating lingering a fraction longer.

Remus was sickened by what he had just seen, but pushed aside his own feelings to look to Tonks.

She was huddled at the head of the bed, her eyes wide and frightened in her too pale face.  She stared at the place where the vision had been, just by the foot of the bed.  

"Tonks?  Are you alright?"  

She turned to him, her eyes brimming with tears.  "Remus…"  She whispered, her voice breaking.

He went to her, sitting on the edge of the mattress.  "Are you all right?"  He repeated.

She shook her head, tears spilling out of her eyes. 

Molly appeared suddenly in the doorway, wand in hand, dressing gown thrown haphazardly over her nightclothes.  The kids, who were yawning and scratching their heads, trailed her closely.  "What happened?  What was all the shouting?"  She asked, concern in her voice.

Tonks glanced at Remus and sniffled.  "I had a nightmare."  She lied.

Remus narrowed his eyes at her.  She gave an imperceptible shake of her head. 

"And the door jammed."  He added.  "Sorry we woke you."

Molly looked unconvinced.  Remus gave what he hoped was a reassuring smile.  He was still shaken by what he had seen.

"Do you need anything, dear?"  Molly directed the question at Tonks.

Tonks shook her head.  "No.  I'm alright now, thanks."

"I'll look after her, Molly."  Remus offered.  "You go back to bed." 

"Well, alright, if you're sure."  She said, turning away and shooing the kids back to their beds.  

When they were alone again, Remus turned to Tonks.  "Why did you lie to her?"  He asked quietly.

She shrugged.  "Molly already has enough to worry about."

He nodded.  "_Do _you need anything?"

She bit her lip.  Her tears had dried, and the color was returning to her face.  "Not.  Not really… just…"

"What?"  

"Would you, um, just stay with me for a little?"  She asked in a small voice.


	5. Night

Diclaimer:  Don't own them.  Sigh.

A/N:  So.  Don't you hate it when your muse makes a liar out of you?  Yeah.  I said be patient.  Had no idea I would finish chapter five an hour later.  

So I got my first bad review.  Heehee.  Made me laugh.  Don't like it?  Don't read it.

So there.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  

            Remus gazed at her for a long time, indecision playing over his face.  Then he sighed.  Did he really want to be alone tonight?  And could he really leave her alone in this room?  

            He looked into her anxious, hopeful eyes.  "Scoot over." 

            She gave him a tremulous smile and shifted over.  He moved to the head of the bed, settling beside her.  Putting his arm around her shoulders, he urged her closer.

            Tonks inched closer, resting her head on his shoulder, laying her hand over his heart.

            "Are you ok?"  He asked softly when she shivered.

            She nodded.  "Yeah.  Just spooked."

            He lifted his hand and started stroking her hair, which was longer than usual and a normal color for once.  "It's ok.  I don't think that will happen again.  At least not tonight."

"So, what was that?"  She asked.

            He continued stroking her hair.  "A residual psychic manifestation, I think."

            "Um, ok, Professor."  She said with a touch of her old humor back.

            "Like a ghost."  He explained.  "Sometimes traumatic events can haunt a place, playing over again like a recording."

            She shuddered.  "So, that… that really happened to Sirius?"

            He nodded, his eyes bleak.  "That was just before he went to live with James. I knew there had been a fight, but he never told me it was bad."

            "Poor Sirius."  She murmured, shifting in his arms to nuzzle her nose against the side of his neck.

            He lowered his head to bury his nose in her hair.  Poor Sirius.  Betrayed, battered and unbroken.  And now he was gone.  Torn from this world, leaving the people who loved him grieving.

            "Poor Remus."  Tonks whispered.  "You miss him, don't you?"

            He nodded, not trusting his voice.

            She tilted her head back to look into his face.  "He loved you, you know."

            "I know."  It pained him to say it.

            "He wouldn't want you to mourn him."  She continued.  "He would want you to be happy."

            Happy.  How could he be?  He was lost.  Drifting without a place in the world.  Or was he?  Despite the shock of seeing the spectre of Sirius' past, despite the coming full moon, he felt… content?

            "I want you to be happy, too, Remus."

            He looked into her changeable eyes.  "Are you happy?"  He asked.

            She looked thoughtful.  "I think so.  I have work I like, friends…"  She paused.  "You."

            He couldn't face the emotions in her eyes, written on her face.  He looked away.  Could it really be that simple?

            A slender hand slid over his cheek, turning his head.  "Remus."

            He forced a smile.  "Tonks."

            She patted his cheek.  "The full moon is coming."

            It was almost as if she had stabbed him.  He jerked reflexively against the pain in his heart.  "Yes."

            "I want to be with you for it."  

            His chest constricted.  "Why?"

            "Because I care about you.  Because I don't want you to be alone."

            He bent his head and kissed her.  "That's sweet, Nymphadora, but I don't think it's a good idea."

            "Don't be silly.  It'll be fine."

            "I'll think about it."  He replied.  

            She yawned.  She couldn't force him to let her be with him on the full moon.  It wasn't as if he was obligated to her at all.

            But, he was here now.  He had stayed when she asked him to.  She snuggled closer to him, letting her hand drop to his heart once more.  She cherished the feel of his arm around her, the beat of his heart under her hand.   She felt safe.

            She felt him heave a sigh.  "Remus?"  She asked softly.

            "Yes, Nymphadora?"  Her replied, his voice equally soft.

            "Are you happy?"

            He was silent for so long, she thought he either had fallen asleep, or just wasn't going to answer her.  Then his hand brushed over her cheek.  

            "I think… right here, right now, I could be."  He whispered.

            It wasn't much of an answer.  He had such an elegant way of skirting a response when he wanted.

            She told herself to be thankful for what she had.  It was more than she had ever hoped for.  Him holding her. Here in her bed.  That could be enough for now.

            She closed her eyes.  "Good night, Remus."  

            "Good night Nymphadora."  He whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

                                                                        ***

            Remus woke enveloped by Nymphadora.  She lay draped over his chest, her legs tangled with his, her arms wrapped around him.  He remained still, wanting to savor the feeling.  It was, he mused, one of the best ways to wake up.  

            Her scent was heavy in his nose, causing a warm thrill to course through him.  He wondered if it would still affect him the same thirty years down the road.  He knew in his heart it would.

            Somewhere along the line, with hardly any time alone with her and just a couple of kisses, he had fallen.

            It came as a bit of a surprise.  He knew it was foolish and reckless to care so much about anyone in these dangerous times.  He, of all people, knew that.  And he didn't care.

            She murmured in her sleep and shifted fitfully.  He tightened his arms around her protectively.  "Shh.  It's okay."  He whispered.

            She woke at the sound of his voice, sighing and stretching, her legs sliding along his, her arms squeezing then relaxing.  

            Gazing down at her young face, he watched as her eyes blinked open.  A dark cloudy blue, they met his and held.  Her lips curved.

            "Morning."  She greeted softly.

            "Did you sleep well?"  He asked.

            "Mmm.  I did."  She stretched again, shifting so that she lay even more on top of him.  "I could get used to this."

            He smoothed his hand down her slim back and up again.  

Like a cat, she arched into the caress.  "Definitely could get used to this."    

Ok, duckies.  Here we go…   To shag or not to shag?  That is the question.


	6. Morning

Disclaimer:  JK owns everybody.              

Tonks tilted her head back to gaze at Remus.  He looked very young in the morning light.  Relaxed, at ease.  The lines that usually marred his handsome face were smoothed away; there was a light in his golden eyes.  She could see the boy he must have been in the man beneath her.  She was certain, as a boy, he had caused a few hearts to flutter, much as hers was now.

            But he was not a boy, but a man.  A man; and a wolf, which she could sense pacing restlessly behind his calm exterior.  A man who was patiently withstanding her scrutiny, eyes locked on hers, lips faintly curved.  

            Propping her chin on her hands, she grinned at him.  "Wotcher, Remus."

            "Nymphadora."  He reached up and sifted his fingers through her hair, which she realized with a start, was her natural color and length.  Honey brown, wavy locks just to her shoulders.  

            "Is this the real you, Nymphadora?"  He asked softly.

            Suddenly shy, she dropped her eyes, nodding.  She never let anyone see her like this, but reverted to her natural state in sleep.  

            His hand moved from her hair to her cheek, cupping it gently and coaxing her to look at him.  She met his gaze with her own, chocolate brown.

            He studied her now, his eyes moving over her features as if seeing her for the first time.  Then he smiled.  "I do like the pink hair, Tonks, but I think I prefer you like this."

            "Boring."  She replied with a laugh.

            "Enchanting."  He countered.

            Oh, he was good.  And the best part was that she knew he was sincere.  Remus would never say anything he didn't mean.

             She had to wonder why some woman hadn't snapped him up by now.  And was grateful they hadn't.

            Any other man might take advantage of this situation, Remus thought.  And he was sorely tempted.  The wolf in him could smell her arousal, which only fueled his own, but in her wide eyes, he could see her trust.  

            She trusted him, and that made him push his hunger aside.  He forced away the wolf's instincts to take, to possess, and wrapped his arms around her.

            He could tell, that if he made even the slightest suggestion that they become…intimate, she would not disagree.  It was a nice stroke for his ego, yes, but it would be wrong.  She deserved more than that.

            The first time should be than a quick morning romp.  He wanted it to be more.

            "We should probably get up."  He said.

            She looked disappointed, but agreed.  "Ok, but one thing…"

            "What's that?"  He asked curiously.

            She inched up and pressed her lips to his in a lingering kiss.  With a soft sigh, he sank into it, letting his thoughts float away for a moment.  His hands tangled in her hair and he tilted his head, changing the angle of the kiss.  She pulled back a little, then darted close to lick his lower lip, rubbing her hips against his.

            Heat arrowed straight through him.  His hands slid away from her hair to grip her hips and hold her still and he groaned.  "Tonks…"

            Her lips curved up, looking much like the canary that had just devoured the cat. 

            "Just checking."  She said wickedly.

            The evil little witch.  "You're a minx."  He growled, claiming her lips once more.  She accepted his fervor with a soft sound, her hand now tangling in his hair. 

            It might have progressed further into more dangerous and much more satisfying territory, but they were interrupted by a knock on the door.

            "Tonks?"  Molly's voice called out.  "Have you seen Remus?"

            The broke apart reluctantly.  Remus looked faintly embarrassed, but Tonks grinned.

            "He's here, Molly."  She called back.

            There was a pregnant silence from the other side of the door, then, "Oh.  Well.  Breakfast is ready."

            Tonks snickered.  

            "Why did you tell her that?"  Remus asked, aghast.

            Tonks shrugged.  "Why not?"

            A blush crawled up his cheeks.  "Well, because now she'll think we've been… er…"

            "Shagging?"  She supplied.

            "Er, yes."  

            "So?"  She countered, a challenging glint in her eyes.

            "Um, well doesn't that bother you?"  He was frowning now.

            She slid off him, kneeling beside him. "Why would it?"  Then she bit her lip, twisting a lock of hair around her finger.  "Does it bother you?"  

            "No.  Of course not."  He looked appalled by the suggestion.  "It's just that people might think I'm taking advantage of you, or something."

            Surprised laughter bubbled out of her.  "Since when do I care about what people think?"

            To prove her point, she closed her eyes, screwing up her face.  A moment later, her hair turned a shocking shade of violet.

            She opened her eyes, which were now the same color as her hair.  "They might also think I'm taking advantage of you, you know.  You being a werewolf and all."

            He looked confused.  "How's that?"

            "Animal passion."  She said.

            His cheeks darkened.  "Oh.  Hmm."  He seemed to be at a loss.

            Oh, that was so cute.  She bent to kiss him once more.  "Let's go to breakfast."

            She bounced off the bed.  Remus had a glimpse of slender pale legs beneath her nightshirt, before she swept on a dressing gown.  

            With a sigh, Remus sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.  He gazed down at his rumpled clothes and brushed at them.  There was no helping that.

            Fastening her dressing gown, Tonks held her hand out to him.  "Come on."

            He rose, taking her hand with a slight bow.  "My lady."

            She giggled, lacing her fingers with his.  Together they went down the stairs and into the kitchen.

            The kitchen was filled with the boisterous noise of the Weasley clan and friends.  The din faded slightly when Remus and Tonks entered.  

            Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny looked at them with undisguised curiosity.  Fred and George immediately began making kissing noises behind their hands.  Remus grinned sheepishly and sat beside Harry.  Tonks went around to the other side of the table, pausing to slap the back of the twins' heads.  Then she sat next to Hermione, pointedly ignoring the curious looks the teenager was giving her.

            Harry was the only one who had the nerve to come out and say something.  

            "So, Tonks, what happened last night?"  The question seemed innocent enough, if one didn't pay attention to the shrewd look in his green eyes.

            She glanced at him while piling eggs and bacon onto her plate.  "Had a bad dream."  She said simply.

            "Uh-huh."  The boy replied with a grin.

            Remus narrowed his eyes.  "Harry."  He said mildly.

            Harry shrugged, his grin remaining firmly in place.  "What?  I was just asking."

            Tonks debated with herself for about two seconds, then decided she couldn't resist.

            "Actually, Remus and I were shagging like bunnies all night."  She announced blandly.

            Remus choked on his tea.  "Tonks!"

            Hermione and Ginny dissolved into giggles, Harry and Ron were staring at Remus with shock, and the twins turned speculative glances to Tonks.

            Molly came to the table, putting a platter of toast down.  "Tonks, really."  Her voice was disapproving.

            Tonks laughed.  "Sorry.  It was a joke, Molly.  I couldn't resist."

            Remus carefully put his cup of tea down.  "Tonks had a nightmare, so I stayed with her.  That's all."

            Molly turned a look of censure on the kids.  "Really.  I'm ashamed of the lot of you, thinking such things."

            Tonks met Remus eyes and winked.  He flushed and looked down at his tea.  The man was a mass of contradictions, it seemed.  He had moves she was sure would have rivaled Sirius', looked like every woman's werewolf fantasy, yet was embarrassed that the teenagers suspected he had sex.

            It was adorable, really.  And when he lifted his head, and she caught his heated gaze with her own, she smiled and ran her tongue over her bottom lip in a seductive gesture.

            The look he gave her after that promised retribution.


	7. Full Moon

The vision of Sirius' past that haunted Tonks' bedroom wasn't a nightly occurrence. As far as she could tell, it happened randomly, with no discernable pattern. Twice in the week since the initial appearance, Tonks had been woken out of a sound sleep to view the apparition.  
  
She was no longer frightened by it, more saddened, but it was still disturbing to witness. Tonight, she was exhausted, after putting in a double shift at the ministry and sitting through a long, tedious order meeting. She had dropped into her bed pausing only to tug off her robes and boots.  
  
When the sounds of the ghostly beating woke her, she didn't even stop to think. She simply disapparated.  
  
Stumbling as she apparated in Remus' room, she landed on her knees by the bed.  
  
"Bugger." She hissed as she clambered to her feet, glancing at the empty bed. Where was he?  
  
Then she heard a soft noise behind her. She turned freezing when she saw the enormous wolf lying on the hearthrug.  
  
Bloody hell. The full moon.  
  
"Remus?" She whispered.  
  
The wolf ducked his head and his tail thumped the floor hesitantly.  
  
Her heart ached for him. "Oh, Remus."  
  
He lifted his head, golden eyes studying her. Then he slowly rose, padding close.  
  
She stretched out her hand. "You can understand me, right?"  
  
He inclined his head in a canine version of a nod, his ears flicking forward. He moved closer, his tongue coming out to lick her wrist.  
  
"I know you didn't want me to be here tonight but that stupid ghost thing happened again and I didn't think I just apparated and ended up here." She said in a rush.  
  
Head tilted, Remus let out a confused sounding whine.  
  
Tonks crossed her arms over her chest. "That made perfect sense."  
  
His tongue lolled out in a doggy grin.  
  
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you making fun of me?"  
  
He made a chuffing noise, as if he were laughing, and his tail waved back and forth like a plume.  
  
"Ok, fine, dog breath. I'll leave if you want." She turned and started to the door. He leapt forward and caught her sleeve in his teeth, whining.  
  
She stopped, glancing at him from the corner of her eyes. She knew that he had probably charmed the door to stop himself from getting out, which meant she couldn't leave that way either, but ignored that. "Do you want me to stay?"  
  
He tugged on her sleeve, his golden eyes pleading. "Urf." She remained where she was, not quite looking at him.  
  
Remus had never wished not to be wolf more than at that moment. He longed to be human, because he would have a voice then and could speak to her. He wanted to beg her not to leave him, to forgive him for teasing her and for not letting her be with him when he changed.  
  
He longed to ask her if it was alright, him being a wolf, and could he please just sit with her?  
  
But as a wolf, he couldn't speak, and had to settle for a swipe of his tongue on her hand and a noise somewhere between a growl and a groan.  
  
She turned to face him. "Are you sure?"  
  
He sank down on his haunches and stared at her.  
  
"I'm not sure what kind of company I'll be. I'm worn out." She told him.  
  
With a pointed look, he went to the bed and launched himself onto it with an easy leap. Then he lay down.  
  
Tonks followed him, climbing onto the bed and sitting cross-legged beside him. She gazed at him for a while, biting her bottom lip. Then she spoke, her voice soft and uncertain.  
  
"Can I... is it ok if I pet you?"  
  
Was it ok? He wanted nothing more than to feel those slender hands on his fur. He inched closer to her on his belly as an answer, and huffed out a sigh.  
  
He watched intently as she reached out her hand, her fingers brushing over the top of his head.  
  
Then, both her hands were on him, fingers curled in his ruff, scratching luxuriously. He kept his gaze locked on her face, feeling a rush of warmth as her lips curved up in a sweet smile. Then she was smoothing her hands over his sides in long strokes. His tail thumped on the bedclothes.  
  
This was much better than sleeping on the hearthrug all alone.  
  
It felt good. He hadn't had any human contact as a wolf in a long time. Well, there had been Sirius, but he had preferred being a dog. And despite the urges of the wolf, which he felt, but was able to control, full moons were lonely for him.  
  
It was a bit surreal, Tonks decided, to be petting Remus in his wolf form. True she wanted to get her hands on him as a man, but hadn't really thought about him as a wolf. It had always been an abstract concept. But when he was lying right in front of her in wolf form, she couldn't have resisted.  
  
His fur was soft and thick, the same color as his hair, a golden brown threaded with silver. His eyes were a little more yellow as a wolf, but still held the same intelligence and humor as the man's.  
  
She leaned down, bringing her face closer to his. "You're very handsome as a wolf, you know." She told him.  
  
He blinked, his ears flicking forward.  
  
She pressed a kiss on his muzzle, just above his nose.  
  
He used the opportunity to graze her chin with his tongue.  
  
Giggling, she shoved him lightly. "None of that, boyo! Behave yourself." But her voice held no annoyance. She yawned hugely, covering her mouth with the back of her hand.  
  
"Sorry, Remus. I told you I was tired."  
  
He inched closer.  
  
She shifted, sliding her legs under the bedclothes. Lying on her side, the wolf in front of her, she resumed petting him.  
  
He settled beside her, laying his head on his paws.  
  
Shortly, she was sound asleep, the wolf watching over her.  
  
Tonks woke early the next morning when Remus, still in wolf form, launched himself off the bed. Blinking blearily, she turned her head, peering at him in the predawn gloom.  
  
He was crouched in the middle of the room, his ears back, his back arched. Then he lifted his head and let out a howl.  
  
Tonks sat up, letting the covers fall away. "Remus?" She whispered.  
  
He howled again, this time a terrible pain-filled sound that chilled her. She stared at him, horrified, as he began to change.  
  
His howl became strangled, turning into a very human cry.  
  
With a gasp, Tonks covered her face with her hands, unable to watch any longer.  
  
His guttural screams tormented her. She wished there was something, anything that she could do for him. Then his voice died out, replaced by hoarse panting, and the dull thud of something hitting the floor. Tonks let her hands drop, tears springing to her eyes at the image that greeted her.  
  
Remus was transformed, curled up naked on the floor, his skin glistening with sweat, his muscles quivering.  
  
Sliding out of bed, Tonks went to him, dragging one of the blankets with her to cover him. She wrapped it around him as best she could without moving him, then knelt beside him, gently touching his shoulder.  
  
"Remus?" She whispered, her voice small and timid.  
  
There was a break in his ragged breathing, but he didn't speak. His face was twisted in an expression of agony.  
  
Cautiously, she pushed him over onto his back, laying his head in her lap. He groaned softly, but opened his eyes.  
  
She was crying, he realized. Tears running downs her cheeks leaving silver tracks.  
  
"Tonks." He said softly, his voice a hoarse rasp. "Tonks, don't cry. I'm alright."  
  
She brushed his hair away from his face. "God, Remus."  
  
He lifted a shaky hand to wipe at her tears. "Tonks..."  
  
"Do you need anything? Any potions or anything?" She asked, a catch in her voice.  
  
"Tonks..."  
  
"Maybe you should move to the bed..."  
  
"Tonks..."  
  
"Tea? Do you want tea?"  
  
"Nymphadora." Exasperation colored his voice.  
  
She stopped talking, and looked down at him.  
  
"I love you." He whispered. 


	8. Memories

Disclaimer:  JK owns all recognizable characters… blah blah blah.

A/N:  Sorry it's been so long, kids!  I've been in a bad place where I couldn't write at all!  But some very funky dreams seem to have fixed that.  Enjoy!

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He loved her.  
  
That thought ran through Tonks' head for the millionth time since his admission this morning.   
  
She had thought she would never hear those words from him. Had assumed she was nothing more for him than a fling. But then he had said those three little words, and she knew that Remus wasn't the type of man to say it if he didn't mean it.  
  
So, after his whispered admission, she had helped him into bed, kissed him on the cheek, and left him to rest. She left him to rest, and had made her way down to the darkened kitchen to cry quietly.  
  
When Molly came upon her a short time after and asked why she was crying, Tonks couldn't explain. She should be happy. She was in love and loved in return. But that knowledge only saddened her.  
  
There was a war coming. In truth, it was already here. And whether they would survive or not was a question no one could answer. Was it worth the risk? To love him and let him love her in return when either of them could be killed?  
  
She posed that question to Molly.  
  
"What is more worth fighting for than love?" Molly countered. "Why sacrifice what happiness you have just because of the sorrow you might have?"  
  
Tonks was inclined to agree, but wondered if Remus would feel that way too.  
  
"What if Remus doesn't agree?" She asked, her voice small.  
  
Molly smiled and gave the younger woman a quick hug. "Remus is a smart man. I think he knows better than anyone how fleeting life can be."  
  
  
  
When Remus carefully made his way to the kitchen later that day for some food, Tonks was back to her usual exuberant self, experimenting with new haircolors.   
While Molly fixed a plate for Remus, Tonks sat down beside him with a cheeky grin.

"Wotcher, Remus."  She said, laying her hand on his knee.

He couldn't help but wonder at that.  When he had told her he loved her, she had practically fled.  He had assumed that his transformation had changed her mind, and that she didn't want to be with him anymore.  

It had happened before.

Eying her cautiously, he toyed with the food on his plate.  "You ok, Tonks?"  He asked in a whisper.

She cocked her head to one side, her eyes bright, her now scarlet hair tumbling over her shoulders.  "Sure.  Why?"

"You seemed upset this morning."

"Well, yes.  I was.  But I'm not anymore."  She replied.

Molly slipped from the kitchen with a quick nod to Tonks.

Remus laid down his fork and turned in his seat to face her.  "You're not upset anymore?"  When she shook her head, he sighed.  "So then, you've decided."

Tonks wrinkled her nose.  "Decided what?"

"That you don't want to be with me anymore."  Remus said quietly.  

She opened her mouth to speak, but he held up his hand to stop her.  "It's ok, Tonks.  I understand."

She stared at him for a moment, then removed her hand from his leg.  

He felt a sharp swift pain in his chest at her action.  Turning back to the table, he gazed down at the plate of food in front of him.  Hadn't he expected that?

"You understand, do you?"  She asked softly.

He nodded, not daring to look at her.

"Remus, you bloody idiot."  She slapped the back of his head.

He looked up.  "What?"

She was grinning at him.  "Didn't last night prove anything to you?"

"How exactly do you mean?"  He asked a bit stiffly.

"That I don't care a whit about you being a wolf."  

He thought about that for a moment.  "But… You said you were upset this morning."

"Of course I was upset, Remus!"  She exclaimed.  "You were in pain and there was nothing I could do."

"Oh."  That was all he could manage to squeeze past the emotions clogging his throat.  He chanced a look at her.  "Really?"

He could see the sincerity in her eyes.  She was truly exceptional, he decided.

She leaned close and kissed him lightly.  "Really." 

Remus smiled, his weariness and aches fading away in the light of her concern.  "I'm glad you were with me last night, Nymphadora."

She beamed at him, but her response was cut off by a shrill scream from another part of the house.

Tonks gave Remus a startled glance, then leapt up and ran from the kitchen, pulling her wand out.

Remus followed a little less quickly, joining her at the door to the drawing room.  The other occupants of the house were gathered there as well, and Ginny stood just inside the door, her hands over her mouth, her eyes wide with fear.  Harry took a step toward Ginny, then paused, uncertainty crossing his features.

Remus entered the drawing room with Tonks at his side, and Harry followed just behind them.

The ghostly apparition of Sirius' mother was easy to recognize, due to the portrait in the entry of the house.  She was in the midst of a violent tirade, directed to an unseen person.

"Flitting about with those people.  That Potter boy, and his mudblood girlfriend.  And that creature!"

Remus tensed, knowing what was coming next.  Harry was staring with undisguised horror, and Tonks' face was set in a stony mask.

"A werewolf, for Merlin's sake!  What is he thinking!  Ruining the reputation of the Black family!"  She pulled her wand out of her robes and pointed it toward the wall where the Black family tree hung. 

"He will not be allowed to besmirch the name of Black any longer!  From this day on, he is not a member of this family!"

Sparks flew from the tip of her wand, and the vision faded away.

It felt like a tight band was constricting around Remus' chest.  He closed his eyes, trying to force the feeling away.

"Barmy old bat."  Tonks muttered.

Remus opened his eyes and gave her a weak smile.

"What, exactly, was that, Remus?"  Harry asked softly.

Remus sighed.  "It's a sort of ghost, Harry.  Not like the ghosts you are used to, it can't interact with the living."

"It's more like a memory, isn't it?"  Harry replied.

Pleased by the boy's intuition, Remus nodded.  "The house's memories, in a way."

Then he turned to face the others.  "Are you alright, Ginny?"  He asked the shaken girl.

She nodded, carefully not looking at Harry.  "Yes.  It just startled me."

Tonks crossed the room to hug the younger girl.  "It's ok, Gin.  You should've seen me the first time I saw it."

"It's happened before?"  Mrs. Weasley responded, her voice tight.  "And you didn't tell us?"

Tonks faced Molly.  "Not this particular one, no.  I saw something else in my bedroom."

"I should have warned you all."  Remus said quietly.  "I apologize."

"What does it mean, though?"  Harry asked.  "Why are we seeing this all of a sudden?"

"I have no idea, Harry."  Remus replied.  It was painful enough for him to see these memories, and he couldn't imagine what it was like for the grieving boy.

"We'll have to speak to Albus."  Molly announced.  "He needs to know about this."

            She turned and left, ushering the others away with her, leaving Remus and Harry alone.

"Have you seen him?"  Harry questioned.  "Have you seen Sirius?"

Remus reluctantly faced him.  "Yes."  His voice was strained.

"I wish I would see him.  Just once."

Reaching out, Remus put his hand on Harry's shoulder.  "No, Harry.  This damn house seems to be dredging up some of Sirius' most painful memories.  You don't want to see that."

Harry shook his head.  "It wouldn't matter.  Just to see him one more time."

"I know you miss him Harry.  I miss him too.  But he wouldn't have wanted you to see these memories."

Remus decided then that he would have to find a way to stop these visions.  To protect the others from any more grief. 


	9. Reading

        Seeing ghosts from Sirius' past became almost a routine thing.  Everyone in the house had seen visions, and Harry had even stumbled onto an apparition of his godfather sitting at the kitchen table.  That particular happening pushed him further into himself.

        He blamed himself for Sirius' death.  Remus shared that guilt as well, blaming himself for not saving Sirius.  

        But Remus' guilt had no place in a heart filled with hopeless love for Tonks. In the days after the full moon, while he regained his strength, she was a constant in his life.  When she wasn't performing her duties as an auror, she was by his side, filling his once dark days with chatter.

        On this particular evening, they were alone in the house.  The kids were back at school, and everyone else was out on some errand or other. Tonks was curled up on one end of the sofa, while he sat on the other, reading.  At least he had said he was reading, but in actuality, he was staring at the pages of the book unseeing, brooding over the strange problem in the house.  

        It was hurting Harry, and that had to stop.  Remus had promised Sirius that he would look after Harry if anything happened to him, and he was going to keep that promise.

        So why, all of a sudden, was the house manifesting these memories?

        Tonks watched Remus as he pretended to read.  He was in one of his moods again, and no amount of inane conversation would draw him out.  She wondered if he even knew she was there.  

        Only one way to find out.  She stretched out her leg and poked him in the thigh with her bare toes.

        He barely even glanced at her before looking back at the book.

        She tried again, poking harder and saying his name.

        "Remus."

        "Mm-hmm."  He responded vaguely.

        "I'm bored."  She said petulantly.

        "That's nice."

        Okay.  That wasn't good.  He wasn't even listening to her.  She poked him again.  "Remus."

        "Mm-hmm."

        "Your head's on fire."

        "Okay."  He replied.

        This called for drastic measures.  She crawled across the sofa, kneeling next to him.

        "Remus?"  She whispered.

        "Yes?"

        "Voldemort just walked through the front door wearing a tutu."

        He blinked.  Then looked up from the book.  "What?" 

        She grinned at him.  At least that had gotten his attention.

        He sighed.  "Tonks, I'm reading."

        "No you're not.  You're just sitting there pretending to read."  She countered.

        "I've got a lot on my mind."  He said, looking away.

        There was only one thing she could think of to do about that.  She reached out and took the book from his hands, tossing it over her shoulder.  Then she climbed onto his lap, straddling him.

        His eyes widened, his hands dropping onto her denim-clad hips.  "What are you doing?"

        Leaning in, she swiped her tongue lazily over his lips.  "I thought I'd make your mind go away for a while."

        His lips curved up, his eyes darkening.  "And how were you going to manage that?"

        Tunneling her fingers through his thick hair, Tonks bent and kissed him with the hunger that had been inside her forever.

        He returned the kiss with equal fervor, his fingers digging into her flesh.  

        It was like coming home after a long absence.  Remus had felt nothing quite like it.  The warmth of her embrace chased away the shadows, destroyed the doubts.

        Sliding his hands up her slender back, he pulled her close, burying his face against her neck.  "Nymphadora…"  He breathed.

        So much was unsaid between them.  So much he knew he would regret not saying.

        He leaned back to look at her, gazing into her wonderful, changeable eyes.  And he could see in her eyes that she knew.

        He kissed her again, pouring all his love and tenderness into it.  He could still feel the wolf in him clamoring to rush, to take, but he subdued it.  This wasn't the time for that.  

        She melted against him, snuggling close, her arms around his neck.  Their lips met in a slow drugging kiss, their breath mingling.

        Deeper and deeper, Remus drowned in the taste of her.  His hand slipped up over her shoulder and the moved down to cup her t-shirt clad breast.

        When she hummed with pleasure, he groaned.  "Tonks, I want you so much."

        She rocked against him, pressing against his arousal.  "Yes."  She sighed. 

        He kissed her again, hands roaming over her slowly, purposefully.  With an impatient sound, she pulled away from him long enough to tug her t-shirt over her head, tossing it behind her.  Then she unclasped the flimsy black lace bra that molded her breasts, letting the lingerie fall away before attaching her lips to his again.

        She was utterly uninhibited, but Remus tempered her heat with gentleness.     


	10. Finally

Disclaimer:  This is all a lie.  I made it up.

A/N:   HEY FANGIRLS!  I updated!  Yay me!  FINALLY!  To everyone who reviewed, Thank you so much!!!  I love getting reviews!  Makes my day!

Used to the hurried fumblings of guys her own age, Tonks was at a loss as how she should respond to Remus' gentle touch.  Her original plan of seduction had left no room for tenderness.  All she had thought of was how much she wanted him right then. 

            But now, that urgency seemed to fall away as his lips slid over hers, teasing and tasting.  She had thought he would rush.  They had been dancing around this for a while now.

            Why didn't he just have her?

His hands skimmed over her, lighting fires in their path.  She squirmed against him, her hands clutching his shoulders.

            "Shh."  He whispered against her lips.  "There's plenty of time."

            Plenty of time?  She felt as if she would explode right now.   She growled low in her throat, catching his lower lip between her teeth.

            When she released him, he just smiled and lowered his head to nuzzle her neck.  Heat pooled in her stomach when his teeth scraped against her throat.  His hands brushed over her breasts, settling lightly on her ribs. 

            It was as if he was weaving a spell over her.  She could do nothing but hold onto him and hope that he would speed things up. 

            He urged her off his lap and onto her back on the sofa.  When she reached for him, he evaded her grasp and trailed his fingers along the waistband of her jeans.

            She shuddered at the touch.  Her hands dug into his shoulders as she lifted her head to kiss him again.

            "Nymphadora."  He sighed.

            She kissed him, her tongue sliding over his lips into his mouth to tangle with his.  She could feel his heart pounding in his chest, the rapid beat matching hers.

            When they broke apart once more, gasping for breath, she nuzzled against his cheek.

            Clothing disappeared, whether by magic or not, she couldn't say, but she was pleased to feel his bare skin against hers.  His hands were everywhere, gliding over her skin, leaving flames in their wake.  Everything ceased to exist but the two of them, lost in a world of warm skin and soft sighs.   She clung to him, lost in the gentleness of his touch. 

            He teased her with teeth and tongue, and she shuddered, lifting her hips against his.  His arousal was hard and heavy against her belly, and desperately she reached down to take him in her hand.

            "Please, Remus."  She begged.  "Now…"

            She could tell when the wolf in him took over.  With a rough growl, he flipped her onto her stomach, entering her from behind.

            She gasped at him filling her so deeply, so completely.  He had one arm under her belly, lifting  her to meet his thrusts.  She could only cling to the worn upholstery beneath them as he moved, his rythym fast and desperate. 

            She let out a keening cry as pleasure rushed over her, only vaguely aware when he tensed as his own release hit him.  He collapsed on to p of her with a groan.

            They lay like that, a tangle of arms and legs, for what seemed like an eternity.  Occasional spasms shook Tonks, wringing gasps from her.  Eventually, Remus shifted, stretching out on his side, drawing her up to lay against him.

            "Alright, Tonks?"  He whispered, his voice rough.

            She hummed, snuggling close to him.  "Definitely." 


	11. Dreaming

Disclaimer: This is all made up.

A/N: Sorry it took so long kiddies. I got tired of this story. Working on something new.

She was dreaming. She knew she was dreaming because Sirius was there, and he was dead.

"You're dead." She informed him.

He gave her a wry smile. "I know. Stupid, really."

Tonks cocked her head to the side. "Why're you here, then?"

Sirius sighed. "We need to talk."

Tonks bit her lip. "We do?"

He nodded and started to pace. As he walked the blank landscape around them began to change, slowly forming a misty impression of the Hogwart's grounds.

She was silent for a moment, watching him pace. "If this is about me and Remus, it's not what you think." She blurted out.

He grinned. "Isn't it? You're shagging him, aren't you?"

"Well, yes but..."

He held up his hand. "Don't get your knickers in a twist, cousin. I think it's aces that you two finally figured it out."

"Oh."

"Did you really think I'm here for that?" He asked.

She shrugged. "Well, I dunno. Maybe."

He shook his head. "No. That's not why. It is about Moony, though."

"He misses you, Sirius." Tonks whispered. "Him and Harry. And now we're seeing ghosts of you all over the place."

"I know." He said gravely. "That's why I'm here."

"How do we make it stop? It's hurting them, Sirius." She said earnestly.

He turned away from her. "They have to let me go, Tonks."

"They have." She said to his back. "They're living their lives."

"They haven't." He said, turning to face her again. There was a deep pain in his eyes. "Not really. Remus may have accepted it, but he hasn't dealt with it. And Harry..."

He took a deep breath. "Harry hasn't even accepted it. He just going through the motions. That's why you keep seeing these... er... visions from my life."

Tonks' eyes widened. "Harry's doing it?"

"Not just him. And not on purpose." Sirius replied. "But it won't stop until they let go."

A cold wind sprung up, dissipating the landscape around them. Sirius lifted head, as if listening to something far off. "I have to go."

Tears sprang to Tonks' eyes. "Already?"

He nodded sadly. "I can't stay. You know that."

She stepped forward and hugged him tightly, surprised at how solid he felt.

He returned the hug, then stepped back. "Tell Harry I'm sorry. And tell Moony..." A touch of his old mischief glinted in his eyes. "Tell Remus it's about bloody time."

Then he turned and walked into the grey mist that surrounded them, disappearing from view.

Tonks woke up. She brushed the tears off her cheeks and snuggled against Remus. They had both fallen asleep on the sofa, his arms wrapped around her. She laid her cheek against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, and sighed.

"What's wrong?" His voice was a rumble beneath her ear.

She lifted her head, meeting his gaze. "How long have you been awake?"

"A little while." He replied, his lips curving. "I was watching you sleep." He lifted a hand to her cheek. "Then you started crying."

She forced a smile. "I just had a conversation with Sirius."

His eyes gleamed in the dark. "And what did Padfoot have to say?"

"It's about bloody time."


End file.
